Why vegetables are better than modern life
January 19, 2007
There’s acute communication breakdown in the veg box household this week. Tinternet, mobile phones, DVD players, ikea fairy lights – everything is broken or on the blink. The only reliable things in our little house are the wireless radio and the veg box – twin pillars of stability in a crazy binary world. Sit down, turn on Woman’s Hour, start munching on an onion, and all is well.
What I particularly love about vegetables is you don’t have to recharge them, configure them, phone a technical support line in India to get them to work. You don’t have to sign-up for an 18-month unbreakable contract with your carrots. You don’t have to wait for the green light to start flashing before you blanch your broccoli.
You don’t hear a nasty electric-buzzing noise when you pick up a butternut squash. Leeks don’t embarrass you by playing ‘The Entertainer’ in your pocket while you’re on the bus home. Kale doesn’t charge you extra for eating at peak time. Spuds don’t come with a 179-page user manual in 33 languages. You don’t need a PIN to open a pea pod.
Modernity sucks. Vegetables rock. And that’s the way it is, duuuudeee.